The List
by cowlvr66
Summary: Why does Edward owe Emmett 8000000000? Why is the pack scattered across La Push? Why is Bella hyper? And who is the king of Emmettopolis? Read to find out.
1. Chapter 1

Disclaimer: HOW MANY TIMES DO I HAVE TO SAY THIS??? ME. No. Own. Twilight!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Chapter 1: The List.

"EDWARD!!!!" shouted Esme from upstairs.

"What do you want Esme? I'm waiting for Bella."  
"Edward Cullen, your life is so unorganized I cannot even tell when you will be available for our weekly truth or dare game session anymore! You need to make a to do list!!!" said Esme.

"FINE FINE FINE! JUST GIVE ME A MINUTE!!!" shouted Edward.

10 minutes later:

"ESME! I FINISHED THE STUPID LIST!" boomed Edward's voice.

"Thank you. Now lets have a look." Said Esme.

1. Arm Wrestle with Emmett.

2. Go hunting with Emmett.

to school with Jasper.

4. Pay Jasper to make Bella hyper.

5. Go jump on every person in the neighbor hood's trampoline with Bella.

6. Take home Bella.

7. Pretend to like Charlie.

8. Watch TV with Charlie.

9. Come home and have Cullen Truth or Dare night.

10. Go spy on Bella.

"Good list Edward. This should help keep your life organized." Said Esme.

"Whatever. But it's time to go arm wrestle with Emmett! BYE!!!" said Edward.


	2. Numbers 18

Disclaimer:  
I DON"T OWN TWILIGHT!!!!!!

Chapter 2: Numbers 1-9

"Emmett!!!!! WANNA ARM WRESTLE??" asked Edward.

"Hahaha you? Arm-wrestle me? Yeah, that'll work out nice for you." Said Emmett smirkily.

"Surrrrreee." Replied Edward. "Bring it ON brother!"

Edward and Emmett wrestled for about ten minutes when finally: "BAM! BEAT YA!!!" said Emmett.

"I will beat you one day. FEAR THE WRATH OF EDWARDO!!!!"

"Edwardo? Honestly Edward." Said Emmett. "NOBODY WILL EVER BEAT THE KIND OF EMMETTOPOLIS!!!!!"

"freak." Muttered Edward under his breath. "Time to go hunting."  
Edward and Emmett ran down to South America, where the mountain lions were in season.

"I'll bet you $8,000,000,000,000 that I can catch more mountain lions than yOuuuuuuuu." Said Emmett.

"You are soooooooooo on!" said Edward.

At the end of their 2-hour hunting trip, Edward had caught only 24 lions, while Emmett had caught 66.

"BOOOOYAAAHH!!!! BEAT YOU AGAIN! WHO'S THE KIND OF EMMETTOPOLIS? ME! ME! ME!!!!" shouted Emmett.

"Sore winner." Said Edward.

"Awww. Who's sad because they lost? Eddie is! Eddie is! Eddie is!"

And on that note, the king of Emmettopolis and little Eddie went back home to work on the next 2 items on the list.

"time to go to school. Wheee." Said Edward.

"HEY! BE HAPPY!!!" said Jasper.

And then suddenly, "OMG Jasper we're going to school! I just love school Jazzy! Don't you just love school????" squealed Edward.

"It's times like these when I wish I were human again." Muttered Jasper.

So the girly Edwardita and Jasper suffered through the school day. At the end of the day, Edwardita turned back into Edward. Then it was time for number 4.

"Hey Jasper. I'll pay you $1,000 if you make Bella hyper." Said Edward.

"Ok."  
All of a sudden Bella ran over to Edward.

"Hi Edward!!! HI HI HI HI HI HI HI HI HI!!! What do you want to do today? I wanna go eat more chocolate and more candy and why is my leg twitching? EDWARD MAKE MY LEG STOP TWITCHING!!!" said Bella.

"Bella I have another idea. How about we go jump on trampolines?" said Edward.

"Oooooooooooooooooh Okay!!!!" said Bella.

So Bella and Edward planned their route. First they would go to Mike's, then Jessica's, then Eric's, then Angela's, then Ben's, then they would go to Jacob's, just to make him mad.

First, they went to Mike's, where Mike was already out on the trampoline, so they kicked him off. Then they broke it. Then the same thing happened at Jessica's, Eric's, Angela's, and Ben's. When they got to Jacob's, the pack was having a party on the trampoline. Edward picked up Bella and they went to the tree above the trampoline and they jumped out of the tree and the pack went FLYING!! Then Bella and Edward ran back to Bella's house.

Charlie opened the door.  
"Edward." He greeted.

"Oh Charlie! You are one of my idols! I looooooooooooooooove you!" said Edward.

"Well that's a little weird." Said Charlie. "Come on in, the Sox game is on."

"YAY!" said Edward, in his girly voice.

They watched the game and then Edward went home for Cullen Truth or dare night.


	3. Number 9

Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight. We all know that.

Chapter 3: CULLEN TRUTH OR DARE NIGHT

"EDWAAAAAARRRRRRRRDDDDD! COME DOWNSTAIRS! IT'S TIME FOR TRUTH OR DARE!" shouted Alice.

Edward walked down the stairs. "Okay, who wants to go first?" asked Esme.  
"ME!" shouted Alice.  
"Okay Alice, truth or dare?" asked Esme.

"DARE"

"Okay Alice, I dare you to tear up your favorite outfit." Said Esme.

"NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" Screamed Alice.

"It's a dare Alice……"

"FINE!"

Alice went upstairs and ripped her favorite outfit to shreds.

In tears, she said "Emmett, truth or dare?"  
"Dare baby!" he replied.

"Emmett, I dare you to make Jacob Black wet his pants."

"YES! FINALLY A GOOD DARE!!!!!!!!" boomed Emmett.

Emmett ran over to Jacob's house. Jacob answered the door and said "What do you want leech?"

"You, sexy." Said Emmett. He ran his hand along Jacob's shoulder. A wet spot appeared on Jacob's pants. "BOOOOOYAH!" shouted Emmett.  
"Now, Edward, truth or dare."  
"Dare."  
"Edward…. I dare you to play the rest of the game naked!"  
"Why?"  
"'Cuz you're as sexy as Jacob." Said Emmett.

"FINE!"

"Now, Rosalie, Truth or dare? "

"Dare."

What should Rosalie's dare be??? REVIEW!!!!!!!


End file.
